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Reviewed by James Parkins and Isaac Thornton
Director: Michael Su
Aka: "Excuse me.. do you sell ice?"
Tagline: 'When the dead are disturbed, no-one will rest in peace.'
Review: It's somewhat difficult to take a movie that seriously, when they have several spelling errors worked into the DVD blurb! If it had been a good film, this would be fairly forgivable, but it seems that more effort went into the DVD case than on the movie itself. The 'Crain' family run funeral home, (and I quote the blurb here... "that provide all the usuakal funereal services"), seem intent on a bit of grave-robbing and casket pillaging on the side… 'GASP…', sounds strange, but when you realise they only have the one coffin, and keep digging it back up after each burial, it seems understandable.... unnecessary, but understandable. Anyway… a priestess girl who happens to be passing through the town of 'Tehachapi Flats' is looking for the burial plot of her not-long dead druid brother, finds the unkempt grave and decided to 'raise the dead in some fantabulous green-light show. Once the dead have been raised, they seem intent on taking out their revenge on the family for their dastardly deeds!!! Before I forget, I should give mention to the sex-obsessed garage owner, who I believe to be the hero of this "story"
Zombie Quality: **
Ok, well it seems that some of the left-over budget has gone on make-up and whatnot, but it appears that only the directors favourites were given the full monty, others seem to be wondering around with merely a dirty suit on.
Zombie Behaviour: **
Pulling themselves out of the ground, walking slowly towards human flesh, everything that zombies do well. (although some of the actors would not seem out of place in a butchers shop next to the smoked ham).
Zombie threat: *
Intent on only hunting down the members of the Crain family, I think the rest of the world is safe :)
Gore content: *
Content being a bit of a strong word, but towards the very end of the film, the zombies seem to get their long awaited flesh-ripping appearance, but it doesn't last. The odd shovel being hammered into some nosey-parkers cranium is nothing special, but something that the film seems to thrive on.
Overall rating: *
Wooden acting, a script that could have been improved by a shredding machine and of course the final hand coming out of the ground in a homage to 'Zombie Flesh Eaters', if this film was a puppy, it would have been put to sleep by the vet to stop it's suffering.
Most shovel related deaths ever seen in a zombie film!
Worst title intro sequence EVER! (EVER)
First zombie DVD blurb to contain spelling errors! (that we've found)